Anticipation

In less than 24 hours this hellish year will finally be fucking over. Yes yes yes, I know, "future is today..."

This is the first year in a long time where I could care less if my NYE plans fall through. Most of the plans are in NYC or Brooklyn with one party in NJ which would just annoy me. Love the friend, hate the company that shows up for his NYE bash. Think Karate kid karate hooligans....

Two years ago was mellow, It was my first cook day and my first rude awakening that I can't stand for 8 hours without my back breaking and my knees wanting to crumble. So last minute I and a couple other folks gathered in Northwest NJ and just hung out watching the ball drop on TV. Last year was the craziest, with a shutdown warehouse party then party van then after hourse post raided warehouse party until 5am - that was one of the best NYE's ever.

This year, I just want to know 2008 is dead and 2009 is alive and kicking.

I have big plans for this year. I'm nervous about making all the changes happen but there will be a lot of reframing and redefining who I am and what I want out of life.

I see trading in 3/4 of my internet time for gym time
I see trading in my apartment for a hotel room and a storage space to pay off my debt
I hope for some love to come by way
I'm looking forward to real travel and capers and adventures
I'm not so much looking forward to but accepting being more disciplined and in control.
I plan on taking more pictures.

I had a last minute highlight to 2008 this week. I got the opportunity to visit with my extended family up in Kingston. i spent some quality time with Larry, Patti, Megs, Alanna and the new addition, Randy. We don't get many chances to hang out with our current schedules and now the distance with Megs and the kids far away on a military base - but Monday was a true blessing and a reminder as to what's really important in this world. Keep your shiny cars, keep your bling and your useless engraved titles on your desks - family and quality time with them in all its forms is where it's at. This is what builds great men and women.

Appreciation of family and spending quality time with the people you love should be practiced and enjoyed more often than one or two weeks for year. I think a lot of folks put it back in a box with the Xmas lights and the tree ornaments. Then they get lost in all of the bullshit for 350 days. I say don't pack it away and enjoy it, it's yours and my foundation and it should be taken like a tincture daily to keep strong.

I cannot say enough about how much I adore Alanna. She's amazing, she has an old soul. A slightly moody old soul, but an old one none the less. I get her temperment all too well and she'll be ok. Well spoken, stands up for her family even at 4 years old. Definitely an artist of some sort. She is too funny at times and foofs freely. Good for her. She has an amazing family to raise her, solid support. The kid even likes Sea Monkeys. Gotta love a fan of the Sea Monkey.

Off to consolidate and get my life in order...